Equality In Comparison To A Collaboration: The Distinction That Makes All Of The Difference

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My wife, N'omi is frequently asked if she doesn't believe in equality for girls, simply because some of the things she says sounds odd to the contemporary ear. But she always replies:

"Why should I sacrifice superiority for mere equality? I've worked at developing my feminine traits and my human abilities. So as a woman, I'm superior. But as a man, I'm a failure.

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Why waste my time attempting to be something I'm not? I can compete properly with men in terms of some of my human capabilities. But just as men can never compete with women in terms of feminine attributes, I can never compete with guys in terms of masculine traits.

Finding the best person to make any loving endeavor a enjoyable one is no effortless feat. You might need to contemplate dating a widower if you're looking for this kind of relationship.

During the many years before I met Joel, I functioned as dad and mother to 5 of my kids. I was only able to fulfill the dad role by telling my children stories of how amazing their father was, and just how much he loved them, and was proud of them. But I couldn't be a father to them; only a faithful mom.

So I believe in becoming the best of what I can be. That includes my feminine qualities, and it consists of my human qualities. For this reason, I'm a very powerful woman, emotionally and mentally. I am not in conflict with myself or with the men and women around me.

Romance is the spice of life. It is not difficult to see how dull and uninteresting life would be without having romance.

I'm busy being me, and getting happier and much more fulfilled with each passing year."

N'omi is truly that wonderful woman, powerful and dedicated to fulfilling her potential, in her own life, as well as in our life together.

What exactly do N'omi and I have? Are we equal? No, because equal indicates the same. Men and females are not the same.

The only way in which all people are "created equal" is that we all have the exact same 24 hours a day in which to make decisions about who we have chosen to be.

Relationships aren't 1 1 = 2. That would be equality. Human relationships are a partnership, to which each partner brings a different variety of qualities: character traits, aptitudes, attributes, thoughts, beliefs, and other accumulated stuff that makes them who they are.

Actually, this means that no two humans, regardless of gender, are genuinely "equal" when they come together.

But when in relationships, you're joining two very different sets of qualities, and adding gender qualities to the situation. This can be a volatile mix because it is a partnership of unequals, not an equality of 2 identical parties. This is why dating to relating can be hard for us and particularly for men who try anxiously to attract females.

When she does call you, we move heaven and earth just to hang out with her. So what if you had previous plans to go out with friends on Friday night?

We need to discard the notion that "unequal" indicates one is superior and one inferior. That's not what it means. "Unequal" just means "not the same," or "different." And anybody can see that every human is different from every other human being.

Individual qualities are individual and never gender-specific. But there are gender-specific qualities that exist and ought to be recognized for what they are just before true partnership can blossom.

Remember: Men and women are two races that share the exact same planet, but not much else! When dating and relating with each other happily, they have to learn about what is unchangeable-in their own and in their partner's nature-and what could be modified.

Then they will stop blaming, and begin working together. That is partnership!

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